As a social being that I am whether I want it or not I cannot be blind to the relationships and interactions between people. I often realize that the values on which I base my friendships and relationships are not in common understanding with the values that the other one possesses. How so? Well…
I grew up with stories of chivalry, respect and true loyalty. I picture a friendship as a powerful, untouchable bound that resists through time. And it involves honesty, sincerity but not spoken out of envy or to do harm, but to help the other get right or develop.
Unfortunately, from the very first friendships I collected I realized people don’t want that. They want a shallow listener and an empty body to carry with them at cinema, clubs, parties, etc. They want you to listen to them bragging about how much wrong they do and what a drama their life is, but do not try to help them fix their life or their mind. Maybe you are thinking: it is not for you to fix – well, you are wrong, you see. It is extremely important to surround yourself with people that help you grow and help you see the wrong in you and fix it. They are a mirror for you. Pardon me, if I don’t want a drama queen with false values sharing my time, my life with me. More than once my „friends” made me realize that I need to shut up and stop caring about people. They taught indifference and ignorance are the values of nowadays friendships. Sad.
Because a friendship consumes time from your personal hourglass. If that time is not consumed in a positive way, you end up lost, confused, empty, superficial. That is not my purpose in life. So I disconnect. A friendship is a treasure not a chain.
It’s the same with love. Love is a manner in which you spend your time. I won’t allow to waste my time on people that do not connect with me at the same level I connect with them. One possible effect of that is to end up alone most of the time. So what? More time for myself, for my habits, for my body, my soul, for my family and my pets.
I also grew up with love stories in which both the man and the woman had equal rights to voice their opinion, to discuss, to respect and appreciate each others work and effort. It was always a mid-way meeting. Never one pushed too much and the other pulled too little. It’s only fair because in the end it’s all about how you cared for your soul and body.
People around you can be positive motivators or inhibitors. When they become a restrain for you, cut them loose.